Feel the Strength

After much reflection, self pity and support, I realized that the strength is always there. In every bleak situation, in every scenario, when nothing seems possible, there is always a ray of hope. You just don't know it because it comes in disguised ways.

Even in rainy days, the sun in hidden behind the clouds. It has been rightly said, every cloud has a silver lining. It's just a matter of time before this silver lining shows itself and gleans its way through. Wait for it, its worth it.

Things happened when I expected them the least and surprises came when I needed them the most. It not only relieved me from previous disappointments, but I was able to appreciate the joy so much more.

Pain just makes you stronger, and makes you appreciate the good things in life. It teaches you how not to take things for granted and value everything good in your life.

So wake up, show some gratitude and don't be bogged down by the lulls in life. Because trust me, in this gloomy day, the sun is just waiting to come out.

The Wall

I look around me and a see a wall. No one around and nothing to hold. No one to uplift me from a state I am in. People try, atleast some do, but I cant seem to heal myself.

I need myself. I need myself to love me. And although I realize the value of myself, it is so hard to actually establish and do.

I don't know what I need. But I need something in life that will ease all of this. And currently the only power I can see is spiritual light. That's the only power that is inviting me and showing me promise to surf over this wave.

Time heals everything. I just have to wait. But in the mean time I also have to heal myself. Slowly and constantly.

The power within you

This is a hard time for me. Emotionally and mentally. And I am dealing with this with the help of people around me. But I realized that I can't have people support me all the time. And this taught me one important thing. I have to help myself.

This is a time where I've lost something dear to me. And its not my fault neither anyone else's. Its just something that was inevitable. But this has cause much heartache and tears. And sometimes I realized, one has to rise beyond these weak emotional moments. Its true, many decisions must be taken from the heart. But when your head starts questioning your heart, you know there is a problem. And this is exactly what happened to me.

I never understood this phenomenon completely until I was in the same position. I have no one but myself to rely on. I ahve to make my heart stronger, my mind stronger and stick by what I believe- no matter how hard that is. Because if I don't, I will end up wronging many around me.

I have always been fair and true. I don't believe in lying or playing games. Keeping this in mind, I know I have to rise above temptations.

I want to achieve a dream. And to achieve that, I have to be strong headed. If I'm not, I will end up making a mess of my entire life and being at the mercy of people around me, always. I have always been independent, but my emotional side takes the better of me. And this experience has taught me that I cannot let that happen. To face this world, I need strength and seeking this strength in people around me will never help. The key is in loving myself. And when I love myself, and am confident of it, nothing can deter me from either my dreams or make me doubt myself. Loving myself is the best gift I can give to myself.

It scares me to think that I have reached a point in life, where I can no more fall back on everyone at the drop of a hat. I have to take charge of my own life and live life on my own terms. Gone are the days where I compromised for people and did things for other peoples' happiness. I have to learn to make myself happy first. Everything eill fall into

The Power of Oneself

Over time, I have begun to realize that the power that one needs to seek within oneself is something people do not do very often. I have always been the sort of person to rely on other people for my happiness or waiting for companionship or praise to fully love myself. But over time and experience I have realized that loving oneself doesn't come with external approval, it comes from within. For other people to love you, it is necessary to love yourself. And I know it's easy to say and very hard to accomplish but taking the first step is essential. I just realized that completely depending on anyone- may it be your boyfriend or best friend- doesn't prove to be fruitful always. Because the hard reality is at the end of the day it is you and only you who has to face the challenges that the world has in store for you. No one is going to pull your hand through it. You got to pull yourself through it.
This was a message my mom used to always tell me but I never understood its full meaning till today. Today, when I realize that nothing is there forever. Things will come to end, or even if they don't, the power and dynamics of companionship changes at different stages of life. Just when you're beginning to get used to someone, they will suddenly surprise you with an emotional jolt or disappearing act. And then you feel lost. But if you're connected to your inner self there is nothing that can make you feel empty or lost. The power to make yourself happy lies within you. Explore it. I'm starting to explore within myself. Now it's your turn.

Deconstructing Life Around and Within Me: Is it Enough?

Deconstructing Life Around and Within Me: Is it Enough?

Is it Enough?

So I have been in a very pensive mood since last night. For some reason, I felt a strange void within me, like a feeling of being unfulfilled. I am in a world class university, in a city that people would die to live in, living a privileged and envious life. Yet, I feel as though I am not doing justice to this life of mine. I have finally figured out my life and the way I want it to shape up. I have figured out my academics and am continuing the job I had taken up last semester, yet I feel like I'm not doing something essential. After reflecting on it for sometime, I figured that I am not doing anything besides academics- I am not doing something I am passionate about. Yes, I am obsessed with nutrition as my passion and am working toward it, but am not developing a talent or honing a hobby. The fulfillment that doing something outside of one's daily duties gives you, is an entirely different satisfaction. I had decided last semester that I would be more involved. Unfairness in dance teams let me down and I was discouraged all over again. But I gave up. Big mistake. I have to keep going on, relentlessly. I am getting into a profession that is going to require undying hard work and patience. If I give up at the smallest hint of failure my survival in this field of work is doubtful.
So I have decided to step up and make my dreams reality! If dance teams don't happen, I should go for clubs, for events, for anything else my vast campus offers! And not give up (like I did my ballroom dance after one disappointing class!). Because in life, for success, giving up is not an option.

The Power of Concentration

Recently, I had noticed, that I was becoming increasingly irritable and a rather unpleasant person to be around. When I was upbeat, my jovial mood would entertain everyone around me, but small things would trigger off an instant outburst making all those around me wish they weren't present. This behaviour was affecting all my relationships and causing problems of various magnitudes. And so, I realized that the problem lay within me. The constant restlessness and anxiety that I felt, was actually a result of the lack of concentration or focus in my life.
Ever since my parents have made me realize the value of opportunity and the blessing in being able to maximize it to the fullest, I have been trying relentlessly to change certain aspects of my personality. I have always been a more or less rounded personality, with minute glitches such as my disinterest in world affairs and my complete resistance to curiosity. But now, that aspect of me has changed. My parents have welcomed the 'every morning starts with the newspaper' girl with open arms. But this is a time in my life where I am eager to change aspects of myself that are unpleasant. Such bouts of self-realization are seldom, but when they come, they do so in full force. This is when I have realized the value and the power of concentration. Concentration is forms such as meditation (which is focus on breathing) and a complete immersion of myself in whatever I do. I feel that this complete submission to a cause results in a sense of fulfillment that leaves no space for irritation or anxiety.
After much delay, I have finally learnt the importance of concentration and complete submission.